Now that I’ve been married for 7 days I feel that I am equipped to give out marital advice. Or at the very least; advice on wedding planning. Since I was engaged for about 16 months, I feel I know a thing or two about the highs and lows of an engagement. So to all you vegan brides and grooms or brides and grooms to-be, here is some invaluable advice from me:
1. Don’t compromise for anyone, until you realize that you need to compromise.
In the beginning, I swore up and down that my entire wedding was going to be vegan. I scoffed at the idea of compromising my ideals and insisted that since I (ahem, I mean WE) were throwing this party we could do whatever we wanted. There was no way I was going to support a cruel industry just because my Dad turned white and gripped the table for support when he heard there would be no steak dinner and I had to send my sister a video on the egg industry when she whined about my mom making a vegan version of our favorite cookies for the dessert table (‘But I want them the way we had them growing uuuuuuuup!’). I was well on my way to creating a new bridezilla-vegan hybrid until my husband to-be quietly said that if we were eating Indian food he really wanted his favorite: butter chicken sauce (minus the chicken). FINE. We would have a vegetarian butter chicken sauce (which nevertheless has cream in it) on potatoes and tofu but I would NOT compromise on anything else!!! (I eventually compromised on many other things).
Doesn’t it give you joy to always let me have it my way?
2. Take your chance to promote great vegan food to unsuspecting guests.
Many vegans will take any chance we get to promote a cruelty-free diet. And why wouldn’t we? It’s fantastic, healthy (if done right), and a positive life choice! My good friend made a 5-layer vegan cake that looked like the cabin where my new husband and I got engaged; I had a dessert table full of vegan desserts; and at 11pm I handed out vegan subway sandwiches from Whole Foods Market. My guests chowed down on some of the finest foods veganism has to offer and had a chance to walk on the compassionate side-all without suspecting a thing! There’s nothing more satisfying than promoting amazing vegan food to unsuspecting family and friends.
Vegan cake by my friend Heather & Hunny
3. At some point you have to let go.
Vegans all have strong convictions, which is why we’ve decided to shun all animal products from our lives. However we all have different limits and at some point you need to accept what yours is. We had vegan beer (for our beer pong table), vegan desserts, and leather-free outfits but was my spray tan vegan? There’s no way of knowing. So at some point you need to accept that you’re doing all you can and that’s good enough.
My family hits the vegan beer pong table.
4. A vegan’s job is never done.
True story: I got married on the hottest day of the year in Vancouver and my wedding was late because we had to stop so that I could call the SPCA emergency number about a dog locked in a car with no windows down. It was the biggest day of my life but it could still wait so that I could help out an adorable pooch.
It actually started at 2:05 – a vegan never rests!
5. It will be the best day of your life.
Nobody hates admitting clichés are true more than me but it really is the most amazing day of your life (better even than finding vegan burritos in the freezer isle or finding the perfect pleather purse). Nobody will give you this many compliments until your funeral and the love for you both in one room is overwhelming. You can’t put a price on seeing your dad do shots of tequila with your bridesmaids, your best friend dance with a bottle of wine all night, or your quiet English in-laws dominating at the beer pong table. So once you’ve confirmed your vegan wines, ignored your family’s pleas for a steak option, and agreed that the big day isn’t all about you (it’s still approximately 90% about you) then get ready for the party of your life!
Best day ever. Photography by MSC Photography.